Sinner.






Monday, November 10, 2008 @ 2:58 AM



Ohh well, when he left me on valentine's day, i promised to myself i'll nvr love again. and then, 'that' group came about. all of us met up every evening and just had a good hell of a time. that was when i started to know you better. that was when you fell in love again. i tried my best to avoid you because i do not want to fall in love. because i hated love. bt stage by stage, you convinced me that love was not what i think it was. you hint to me that you wanted to be myne. you wanted to give me the chance to change myself as a girlfriend. and you did it well..i fell for you..i practically fell in the fantasy world again..
The day before we got together, you sat by me in the theater and asked me whether it was alright for you to hold my hand. i smiled, and you held it for the first time.you called me that night.i agreed to be ur gf at midnight.i felt so wrong.i felt unsure.then comes my birthday.u presented me with the necklace by the corridor of my house.i felt loved.situations followed by the many misunderstandings we both had with friends.it suddenly strucked me that our relationship was a mistake.i told you so but u said that this is normal.things like this happens in every new born relationships.you promised that we will pull this through together.and when we did, you said, 'look, we made this through together. this proves that we can overcome any other challenges together in the near future.' i strongly believed you.
Many months passed and we passed a lot of thick and thins.i tested you're sincerity and you did too.promises were made along the way.we learned to talked about our problems and keep no secrets between ourselves.untill one fine day, a friend told me a dark secret of yours.a secret that pissed me off so bad that i wished you'l just abandoned me.but u didnt.we moved on and continued this relationship, struggling to reach off to each other's mind and attend to each other's needs.We did tried our best.we did.
Rmbr our first hug baby?rmbr our first french kiss?rmbr the first movie we watched?the movie that thought us what love truely means?rmbr what our first argument was all about and how we talked it all out?rmbr 19th May?rmbr when you promised me that you'l still love me even if i got myself 'into trouble'?rmbr when we sat by the rocks at East Coast and you said that that was the best day you eva had with a girlfriend?rmbr when i said i'l use my blood to colour the red of the rainbow of your life?rmbr what you did with the curry sauce, pepper and mayonnaise at macdonalds?rmbr when we cut up the heart shaped $2 note?rmbr what happened at the sky garden?rmbr when we applied for the job at guardian together?rmbr the last time we went to the library during our last monthsary?rmbr why we called it 'budget monthsary'?rmbr why and how we got our own diary?rmbr the last time we laughed together?rmbr how we cried together thinking of our relationship?rmbr the last time you and i said that we love each other?
Look what's in store for us now.im unsure.what do you think?baby, just a few hours ago, i thought we could pull this through together..i was only trying to prove some people that they are very wrong.that i have the best boyfriend any girl could have died for.i owned this dream boyfriend!he is perfect, he is all i wanted and he is you!you!HadiHairilHambali!you!i really thought you knew me well baby..
i'm sorry to break you're heart baby..myne's broken too..im sorry to be the sensitive and selfish one in our relationship.i just wish i could kill that part of me.this, is too big a blow for me to take.u said you needed time.well, you'll have all the time in the world.as for me, i'l just wait for you to come back and talked our problem out, just as we did a long time ago.no matter what, i still love you baby..



Dear Superman, u made me stronger.though u don't know the exact truth, you lifted my spirits.thank you for being there for me.wish you all the best in ur up coming events in life..

Dear mommy, im sry you had to wake up and attend to my cries. im sry too that i can't tell you y im crying and all.i just don't want you to get worried.thank you for feeding me panadol and making me early brkfast.you'r the best mommy anyone could have asked for!I LOVE YOU MOM!!

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Sya. 18.